In the mountains, summers are sacred. Before you know it, they’re gone. However, for all of summer’s fleeting nature, there are some folks that think that they last just a bit too long—they’re ready for winter.
There are several ways to spot these snow-smitten folks. They’re the ones planning next season’s runs while gazing at summer slopes, the individuals wearing a beanie in 90 degree weather and the people who try to use their ski pass as a form of identification.
While it’s easy to spot these winter die-hards from afar, it can be difficult to come to terms with your own obsessions. Never fear, though—if you’re having trouble determining whether you’re truly addicted to winter, we’ve come up with a quiz to help make a diagnosis.
What’s your dog’s name?
Do you cultivate your goggle tan year round?
A. Of course not. That would be silly.
B. I’m rocking a sweet sunglasses line right now, but I’ll start donning goggles in October.
C. My idols include Ranger Rick, Rocket Raccoon and the Hamburgler.
How many ski or snowboard movies have you seen in the past two weeks?
A. None. I’m waiting for the new Warren Miller movie to start my ski season.
B. One. I pulled out Swift. Silent. Deep because I’m thinking of joining the Jackson Hole AirForce.
C. 16. Why? Is that weird?
When do you start thinking about your ski gear?
A. A few days before my ski trip.
B. I take stock before the pre-season sales to see what I need.
C. My gear is already in my car, ready to go.
Word association time: When I say “beach,” what comes to mind?
A. White sand.
C. Arapahoe Basin.
How many days have you put on your skis or snowboard since May 1?
A. None. The ski resorts are closed. Duh.
B. I got my snow fix at Woodward, so six or seven?
C. Let’s see…there are 31 days in May, 30 in June…so, 99?
How do you feel about an endless winter?
A. It sounds chilly.
B. I did that for a year: Winter in both North and South America.
C. I have skied every day for the past 400 days.
What are you doing in your Facebook profile picture?
A. Drinking an umbrella drink in the Caribbean.
B. Ripping on a mountain bike.
C. Hiking for some sweet turns.
When is opening day for your home resort?
A. In November
B. November 20
C. In 65 days, 13 hours and 45 seconds…44 seconds…43 seconds…
What is your favorite pickup line?
A. What’s your sign?
B. Is your name Google? Because you’re the answer to everything I’m searching for.
C. I skied 7.5 million vertical feet last season.
Mostly As: Though you obviously are a fan of winter, you’re not quite ready to walk down the aisle with it. Our prescription? Plan on at least 10 ski days and call us in December. You’ll be hearing wedding bells soon.
Mostly Bs: You’re definitely showing signs of becoming a full-on winter junkie. In order to keep your priorities straight, consider donning your onesie for your ski pass photo. It’s what all the cool kids are doing.
Mostly Cs: This should sound familiar: “Hi, my name is (state your name) and I’m a winter addict.” Fully ensconced in the ski scene, you actually have ice crystals in your veins. We’d like to offer some sort of therapy program, but as you know, there’s ain’t no cure for the summertime blues. The good news? The first North American ski resorts will probably open in about six weeks. Until then, there’s always Chile.