A Quick and Dirty Guide to Hot Tub Etiquette

My friend’s brother used to be such a skibum that he laundered his dirty socks in the dishwasher alongside yesterday’s dinner crockery.

In one sharehouse from my skibum days, ski socks were worn in the shower for an “in-between visits to the Laundromat”-refresh.

Luckily, we never had a hot tub. I can’t imagine what it would have doubled as. Personal hygiene standards are not at their utmost when one investigates a ski town’s lower-caste of 20 year old seasonal workers.

All the more reason to take note of the following Etiquette Guidelines.

 The 3 Golden Rules of Hot Tubbing

1. Socks don’t belong. Soak ‘em in the kitchen sink, if you have to. But the only things that should ever be incubating in a hot tub are the evening’s plans. Take inspiration from the Japanese onsen, where everyone is scrubbed to a clean pink sheen before getting in.To put it another way: A hot tub is only a substitute for a shower if you already are on body-fluid exchange terms with all the other people currently (and potentially) in the said tub.
2. The people already in the tub set the dress code.So, don’t go Full Monty unless everyone else is, and you’re safely past the Family Hour.
   

   Sneaking Into the Four Seasons Hot Tub

3. When poaching, leave your clothes in an easily accessible pile. Inevitably, security will catch you, and you’ll have to make a mad dash over the fence and away into the woods. If you’ve foreseen this, you’ll have your feet in your Sorels and a plastic bag of clothes over your shoulder as you scamper into the darkness, leaving only a few puddles and rumours of a Sasquatch sighting in your wake.

In that same vein, remember our Safety Tip of the Day: A hot tub is not the place to rehydrate. Don’t be lulled into thinking that a quick dip in those healing waters will help revitalize you. Au contraire, my friends. Hot tubs hasten coma. I (*hangs head in shame*) tell you this from experience.

The Hot Tub as Ski Town Icon

Tales from the Resort-town Underbelly aside… a snow destination is worth picking based on its après-ski hydrotherapy offerings.

After all, it was skiers who turned “hot tub” into a verb. The hot tub is the après-ski icon.  A tradition. A gathering place. A chance to chill and socialize and rest weary muscles, (the ultimate trifecta of accomplishment), as well as to hatch the evening’s or next day’s plans.

Here are 4 hot-spots in Western Canada to keep in mind for their legendary offerings – so that even if your condo doesn’t have a hot-tub (or you can’t get your feral brother-in-law to abide by the Golden Rules), you can still seek the reprieve and rejuvenation of an après soak.

• Kootenays:
  • After a day skiing Red, Whitewater or with some of the Powder Highway’s infamous cat and heliski operators, seek out the ancient healing remedy of natural mineral baths, at the Ainsworth Hot Springs. The springs attract worked-over snow tourists and grey-haired locals in equal numbers, drawn to the restorative powers of the natural hot springs and the high mineral content of the water.
  • Near Revelstoke, choose from the Halcyon Hot Springs on the shores of Arrow Lake or Canyon Hot Springs, to help you recover from a day slaying some of the steepest slopes in North America.
• Rockies: You can’t say Hot Springs without going to the source of the Source. Discovered in 1884, the World Heritage listed Banff Upper Hot Springs gives you hydrotherapy with a dose of history.
• Coast: Whistler wasn’t going to let a lack of natural mineral hot springs stand in the way of providing guests with a serious dose of relaxation. So in 2009 the Scandinave Spa introduced the Finnish hot, cold and steam tradition to Whistler. The “code of silence” only enhances the sense of retreat.

 

What would YOU add to our hot tub etiquette list?